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Everyone parents differently, and quite often if parents of two different children don’t agree on something, you just keep your mouth quiet and move on.
I’m sure there are parents who see me ignoring my screaming child wondering what I’m thinking, but I know that if I give in to the screaming — attempts to get their way — it will happen over and over again. My child, my rules, thanks for respecting them.
However, I have become aware of two different items parents are purchasing for their children that make me shake my head and really wonder, “What are they thinking?”
The first new trend is for infants. The item came to my attention on “The Today Show” this past week. I was half-listening as the hosts bantered back and forth. I wondered what the hot issue was and then I saw it: high-heeled crib shoes for infants. The shoes are made by the company Heelarious, started by two moms who love shoes. The shoes come in several styles, including leopard print and pink satin, and run about $35. They are not meant for walking and are only sold in size 0-6 months.
High heels for newborns is a bit much. After all, with kids already growing up too fast these days, why encourage it?
Those in favor of the shoes seem to be women who love shoes; what’s wrong with passing their passion onto young babies? Those against argue that this is one more example of adult-style clothing made for children: Shouldn’t kids be wearing fuzzy bunny slippers in their cribs? Instead, these women are marketing Playboy bunny-style slippers. What’s next?
The next item that has me shaking my head is the book “My Beautiful Mommy.” I saw the title in a magazine listing books for Mother’s Day, and without reading the description, I thought it was a book about how a child thinks their mommy is beautiful no matter what. After all, they do see us at our best and our worst; baseball caps are a staple in our home — not for the boys but for me. However, this children’s book is written about “a young girl whose mommy goes through plastic surgery and the whole family pitches in to help mommy achieve beautiful results.”
The book is written by Dr. Michael Salzhauer, a plastic surgeon in Florida who has performed many “beautiful mommy makeovers” and considers himself an avid bedtime storyteller. He even has a “My Beautiful Mommy” Web site filled with information for parents and games for children.
While a parent being in the hospital for any reason can be scary for a child, I find the approach this book takes is a little bit offensive. Wasn’t mommy beautiful before surgery? Sure her nose may have been a little big or her tummy soft, but don’t we usually teach our children beauty comes from the inside?
“My Beautiful Mommy” also creates another issue: low self-esteem for girls and women. This is not some small problem, either.
The Girl Scout Research Institute conducted a study in 2000 that found dissatisfaction in body image increases as girls become adolescents, and when asked, 33 percent of girls age 14 to 17 felt they were too fat and two-thirds were dieting.
This book seems to reinforce the idea that physical perfection is necessary; even the illustrations show the surgeon with bulging muscles resembling Superman and mom beautiful in the beginning and after surgery just having a little band aid on her new nose.
Needless to say, I will not be running out anytime soon to buy heels for my daughter or read “My Beautiful Mommy” at bedtime. Other parents will, and just as they try not to stare at my screaming child, I’ll try not to stare at their newborn sporting zebra print pumps.
Modjeski lives in Winona and her column appears in the Winona Daily News on Monday.
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