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She turned with a scowl and scolded them, telling them to sit and be quiet, just like a mother would. A hush fell over the twins as they sat on a nearly finished deck, though the silence was only temporary.
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Alexa Hesch, 8, left, recalls her memories of the flood with her four-year-old twin brothers, Ryan, center, and Ethan, as they sit on the new front porch of their family’s rebuilt home on Sherry Drive in the Gunderson subdivision of Goodview. The siblings and their parents, Patrick and Shelly, were evacuated from their home by neighbors and firemen as Garvin Brook flooded the subdivision in the early morning hours of August 19, 2007.
(Photo by Melissa Carlo/Winona Daily News)
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These days, Alexa calls herself the mini-mom.
“That happened a lot more since the flood,” she said.
The energetic 8-year-old is still small enough to be carried. Last year, she and her brothers were brought to safety in the arms of neighbors and firefighters, as her parents tried to salvage belongings from the water rushing into their front door.
Shelly Hesch — the mom to the mini-mom — didn’t want to worry her kids as the rains continued to pour that night. When neighbors came to say it was time to get out, Alexa didn’t know what was going on. Her mother told her to get her jacket. She thought her mom just wanted her to see something interesting outside.
“I freaked out, because my mom didn’t tell me what was going on,” Alexa said. “I looked outside and went, ‘Ooooh.’”
That’s when the worry set in. She called to her dad to grab their dog. The child thought about her prized possessions, like a stuffed bear she’s had all her life.
“I was very scared. I was crying,” she said. “I thought I wouldn’t get my bears back.”
Shelly and her husband, Patrick, put the kids in the entryway to their house. Alexa told her mother that Ethan was missing a boot, so she turned and went to find it. When Shelly turned back, the kids were gone, grabbed and carried to the road above by those that came to warn them of the rising Garvin Brook.
“I couldn’t find my other boot, and when my mom found it, I was gone,” Ethan said.
The kids were safe, but the house wasn’t. Water reached the top floor of the Minnesota City home in the Sherry Drive community. The cars ended up in the backyard and the garage was ripped off. In the end, there was so much damage that the Hesches were forced to strip the house to its studs.
Then, they started rebuilding.
“Our house got broke,” Ethan said. “My dad fixed it.”
Dealing with loss
In the Thompson family, it’s almost impossible to feel alone.
There are enough Thompson children to fill up a large house. But for months, the seven kids and two parents in the Thompson family have been crammed into an apartment, waiting for a new home to fill. Their old house was destroyed in the floods.
Just three weeks before the disaster, the Rushford clan had finally moved into a home that could accommodate them all. They were hoping to turn their large house into a bed and breakfast, a family-run business.
Nick Thompson and his younger brother Seth had always shared a room. Their new home gave them a chance to spread out a bit.
“I got my own room for the first time in 13 years,” he said.
It was short-lived. After the floods, the Thompson family bounced from a relative’s house to hotel rooms in Preston, Minn., La Crosse, Wis., Winona, for months.
Like the Hesches, the Thompsons lost their homes and most of their possessions. Toys, a special blanket, a teddy bear. These were the treasures lost — treasures that can bring comfort to children in trauma, said Marcy Allen, a counselor for Zumbro Valley Mental Health has treated flood victims. Missing these items makes it harder for children to recover, she said.
“Kids don’t have the internal resources and the experience that adults have,” Allen said. “As adults, we have had a lot of life experiences to deal with stress and new situations, and we know who to go to talk about this or that. Kids don’t have that.”
Some children exhibit regressive behavior after traumatic events. Children who are potty trained may begin wetting the bed. Older children may start sucking their thumbs. Frequently, they’ll have nightmares or trouble sleeping in their own beds.
Moving on
Like the Thompsons and many others, the Hesch children spent months living in temporary quarters. While Patrick began rebuilding the family home with friends, relatives and neighbors, the rest of the family lived with grandparents.
Alexa missed not seeing her friends every day.
“I saw them, but it wasn’t the same,” Alexa said. “Now, we see each other every day.”
During the rebuilding, the kids tried to offer a helping hand. Alexa cooked with her mom for her dad and the rotation of volunteers. Patrick worked long nights, but the effort gave him pride and brought family members around “they’d forgotten they had.”
“People just came out of the woodwork,” he said.
Finally, the family moved back in a few days before Christmas.
It’s a little easier for Alexa to think about the floods these days. For a time, she’d think about what happened and get upset, especially during storms. But Alexa says a trip to Camp Noah — a day camp run by Lutheran Social Services of Minnesota — helped her learn to cope with her feelings. The camp teaches children how to express their feelings and understand how to feel safe again.
“I learned not to worry, because it’s always OK,’ she said.
It’s important for people to recognize that the stress of things like the flood can take a toll, Allen said. The Flood Recovery Partnership has met with thousands of people affected by the flood to talk to them about what happened. But, she said, there’s more people out there.
“People try to deal with it themselves, until they meet a breaking point,” she said. “I wish people would seek us out before that. They wouldn’t have to go through so much.”
Alexa said things are still not back to normal. Her dress-up and winter clothes are gone, and many of the toys she and her brothers have were donated to them. Things are looking up, though, and she’s looking forward to next week.
“Things will feel more normal when school starts,” she said.
Point to Ponder wrote on Aug 22, 2008 11:12 AM: