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And then the crickets started chirping to tell me I had a phone call. Reluctantly, I cast aside my Bollywood dream world and picked up.
It was my friend calling to cancel on me for the fifth time in two months. I dropped out of an all-star Bollywood dance routine for this. OK, no worries, I’m sure she has a really good excuse. Nope, she’s just tired.
She’s tired.
I’m the one who’s gotten four hours of sleep in the past two days and she’s tired. Well actually, she’s not really tired, she’s just afraid she might be. After all, she does close the night before we’re supposed to get together, and despite the fact that she has the entire day off before she has to drive a whole two hours to come see the speaker we were planning to go to, she thinks she might be too tired to do it.
I wouldn’t care if she had a good excuse, heck, I wouldn’t care if she had a bad excuse. I wouldn’t be so annoyed, but she’s the one who suggests these activities and then backs out at the last minute. And it’s always the same reason: “I’m too tired” or “I might be too tired.”
She’s missing out on her life for the constant companionship of her bed.
Now, I like my naps more than the next girl, but I have never backed out of an activity because I was too tired. I’ve never even backed out of work because I was too tired. I’ve gone to work within two hours of arriving home from almost every trip I’ve ever gone on. And did my co-workers hear about how tired I was? No. That’s because at some point in my early 20s, I got sick of everyone talking about how tired they were as a topic of discussion.
It’s a common sticking point. Everyone is tired, whether they should be or not and nobody needs to hear about it. Just once, I would love to hear a co-worker come in and say, “Man, I’m really rested. I didn’t even get eight hours of sleep and still I feel really rested and ready to tackle the day.”
There is a scene in “Terms of Endearment” when Jack Nicholson’s character says to Shirley MacLaine’s character (Aurora Greenway), “I like the lights on” to which she responds, “Well, go home and turn them on.”
This is how I feel like responding when someone says they’re tired.
“Well, go home and go to bed!”
I have yet to do it, but someday my inner Aurora is bound to rear her well-coiffed head.
More and more I keep hearing people refer to how tired they are and more and more I find myself unable to sympathize. My friend is currently doing a grad school internship and raising three children, two of whom are under six. I have yet to hear her complain about being tired. My other friend was putting in 90-hour work weeks and yet she still found time to hang out with her friends. She now spends her days listening to a co-worker who claims she never has time to relax and if she is reading it is something for work. Sounds like someone seriously needs a time management workshop to me.
Or, perhaps she enjoys being a martyr to her job or maybe she just enjoys telling people she is.
All I know is I follow the advice of a magazine advertisement I once clipped out and hung on my bulletin board: “If you’re too tired to do it now, just think how you’ll feel when you’re 90.”
So before you say, “Man, I’m so tired,” think about whether you really are. Usually you’re not, you’re just filling a lull in the conversation, and if you are really tired, do us all a favor and make it a point to go to bed a little earlier tonight.
Donna Strumski is a thirtysomething traveler who has a passion for both Bollywood and chocolate.
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