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Although his name was Leo, we all called him Schnurbart. Schnurbart means mustache, a big one, and his was classic, tobacco stains and all.
You can’t make up a name that gets anywhere close to being as descriptive as his. When you say his name you need to think about what you are going to say, roll it around in your mouth, and pucker your lips, plan on drawing it out. Then when you can’t hold it in any longer spit it out: Schnurrrrrrbarrrrt Parrrrra-dowwwwwski.
It feels so good when you finish. The way it rumbles deep in your head one wants to say it again and again. For those of us who can’t roll our r’s this is as good as it gets. By the spelling, I assume the Paradowski family came from the border area near Germany and Poland.
Just saying his name makes me want to enroll in the next German class offered at the local high school. Because the village is tiny, we didn’t have a lot of names in the old phone book. But if you string a few of the right ones together and include a nickname or two you have the makings for a short poem.
Waumandee no longer has its own phone listing. It now is combined in with the metropolises of Cochrane and Buffalo City. I’d like to tell you about the yellow page, but that is for another time.
I’ll just tell a few remembrances of Leo and then let you imagine the rest.
I was a bit young when he was at his best, but Frank Weaver and my brother Dan tell some good stories.
He was a retired farmer who moved to town and lived next to the bank. It is important to know that because if you watched him pull out his roll of money you’d think that he was the bank. I have no idea how much money was in the roll, but at one time he carried a lot of cash.
When he got older the bills were mostly fives and ones. Everybody including our dad warned him about carrying that much money, so that’s probably why he did. Like most of us he wanted some form of notoriety.
When Dan shows how Leo removed the rubber band before opening the money roll, or when Frank Weaver wet a thumb and strains to imitate Leo pull and pull and squeeze and then pull once more before extracting a small note, it is well worth your time.
Then Frank or Dan typically add another story or two about the roll of cash.
All the while these two guys are unrolling the imaginary money they are quoting Schnurbart. Schnurbart had a propensity to start most sentences with a drawn out “Herrrrrrrr.”
Dan and Frank and Roundy Zeller began too many sentences with that “Herrrrrr” sound for a few years. It drove my mother nuts, much like parents going ape over modern kids ending sentences on a high note as if all sentences are questions.
Schnurbart liked money, including “maiden head” dimes. He would sort through the change of other bar patrons looking for a “maiden head.” Now Roundy didn’t like Schnurbart’s hobby very much and one time pounded his fist on the bar, scaring Schnurbart and everybody else within earshot.
Leo was a very agile old timer. He could kick his foot high in the air — literally. Often in the middle of the conversation, Leo’s foot would appear on top of a counter or bar. He would then innocently say, “Can you do that?”
At an open house at Buff Benusa’s new business, Schnurbart amazed the crowd by kicking the top of the seven foot door frame several times as different groups wandered near Leo and the door frame.
Although he could deal off the bottom of the deck, he also tipped the cards allowing the other players see any black queen disappear when playing Schafkoph (sheepshead).
I hope you enjoyed the every day character from our town. Schnurbart was a regular guy doing regular things. More importantly, I hope you record the daily activities of your childhood so your grandchildren get to know you better. There is a little of Laura Ingalls Wilder in all of us.
Until next time, Orlin Brommer
Brommer is a lifelong resident of Buffalo County. “Therefore being normal is a constant struggle. Maybe the hills, coulees and dugways are to blame for the imbalance,” he says.
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