Take time for mental health awareness
By Maggie Modjeski

I put my foot in my mouth the other day. I made a comment I didn’t think much about in the wrong place at the wrong time. It basically had something to do with my children driving me … (fill in the blank). I didn’t realize at the time how insensitive it was.

May is mental health awareness month.
The face of mental health has changed so much. Taking care of one’s mental well-being should no longer be a stigma or something to be ashamed of. Instead, we are encouraged to ask for help and share experiences with others on the road to recovery.

For example, it is now acceptable to talk about postpartum depression and ask for help or support. As a mother of three, I was shocked to learn how many mothers suffer from it. For years we’ve heard of the baby blues, which affect women about a week or two after birth. But until recently, postpartum depression has been something women are afraid to talk about for fear of being judged.

According to WebMd, postpartum depression affects about one in 10 new mothers. If you’ve had postpartum depression before, your risk increases 50 to 80 percent in subsequent births. You may experience alternating highs and lows, frequent crying, irritability and fatigue, as well as feelings of guilt, anxiety and inability to care for your baby or yourself.

Symptoms range from mild to severe and may appear within days of the delivery or up to a year later. Although symptoms can last from several weeks up to a year, treatment with psychotherapy or antidepressants is very effective.

More often than not, when we hear about postpartum depression in the news it is when a mother does something to harm her children, such as Andrea Yates, who drowned her five children in 2001. Not all sufferers feel so desperate.

Fortunately for moms who are suffering, Brooke Shields opened up in her book, “Down Came the Rain.” Her revelations made others feel it was okay to share their stories.

A Winona mother who asked to remain anonymous said the first time she suffered postpartum depression, she tried to keep busy to not feel low and unhappy. She found herself obsessed with certain thoughts and behaviors, some days barely able to get herself together and afraid to tell anyone. She coped by keeping a rigid schedule from morning to night.

She was first diagnosed bipolar because of the highs and lows, but after further discussion with her health care provider, she was diagnosed with postpartum depression. A change in medication and therapy has changed her outlook.

She said sharing her story with friends brought her closer to some, but she also lost some friends who didn’t understand the condition. Through it all her husband has been supportive and has helped her heal.

Shields, in her book, wrote, “The scars left behind are trying to gain people’s trust again and not feeling the need to bound through life as a “happy camper” to prove I can do it all.”

Postpartum depression doesn’t just affect women. Fathers can suffer from it too. The reasons may be different, says Terrence Real, a couples therapist and author of “I Don’t Want to Talk About It: Overcoming the Secret Legacy of Male Depression.”

“Generally speaking, a man may be feeling burdened or entrapped at the prospect of caring for a child or caring for yet another child. They will feel like all the financial responsibility is on their shoulders. Or maybe men are suffering withdrawal from being tended to in their marital relationship,” he says. “They are missing their wives.”

While postpartum depression has become much more recognizable, there are many other mental health problems that affect women.

Depression as a whole has been shown to interfere with women in the work place. Many have blamed the loss of a job on their condition, even if they are receiving treatment or taking medication.

“Depression is the number one barrier women face in the workplace,” says Lea Ann Browning McNee, senior vice president of the public affairs and community development at the National Mental Health Association (NMHA).

Browning McNee is currently advocating for more support of depression in the workplace. “Because depression affects the bottom line,” she says “Don’t expect supervisors to be sympathetic.”

According to the NMHA, more than five million women working outside the home are affected by some sort of depression.

Depression is such a sticky topic, no matter what type it is. When thinking about writing this column I was concerned how people would take it. I hope that it has opened some eyes and made some realize they are not alone.

Take the remainder of this month, Mental Health Awareness Month, to think of how you may be able to help others who need it. Depression doesn’t discriminate; it can happen to anyone at any time male or female, mom or dad.

Maggie Modjeski is the former executive director for the Winona Community Foundation. Each Monday, she writes about the challenges and joys of raising a family and being part of the Winona community. Her email address is maggiem@hbci.com.

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